I guess I'll write a stream of consciousness.
It's kind of a weird idea.
I don't really know what I'm doing.
What if I think something in Spanish?
Do I write that too?
Hola.
Que tal?
Estoy aqui con nosotros hoy.
Malarone gives you such weird dreams.
Last night I had a really weird dream about graduation.
I don't really know what that was about.
And in Nicaragua I dreamed about a huge polar bear in a barn.
I think it was from Narnia.
I really need to finish my powerpoint for the symposium.
I'm really scared to talk in front of everybody.
I hate doing stuff like that.
It's so scary.
I hope I don't look dumb.
Peace.
I love white Christmas lights.
I have them hanging in my room.
You know what I hate?
When people don't call you back.
I always overthink it.
And it makes me crazy.
I am thirsty.
I feel really unprepared for college.
I have the worst study habits.
Actually, I just don't study.
And I procrastinate.
Like a pro.
Professional basketball.
Why am I thinking about basketball?
Oh, I know.
I was watching Shark Tank today.
And Mark Cuban was on.
He owns a basketball team.
The Dallas? Mavericks?
I think.
I like Shark Tank.
They're smart cookies.
They know what's up.
I was thinking about majoring in business.
But now I want to be a teacher in Puerto Cabezas.
And I'm planning on majoring in Politics, Philosophy & Economics.
And minoring in Education.
I don't know what God wants me to do.
He'll work it out though.
My phone keeps vibrating.
Oh.
It was Michael.
I like him.
I'm wearing his sweatshirt.
I take all his clothes.
I feel bad.
I'm not gonna see him for another week.
Dumb H+M, making him work.
It's okay though.
I'll work on my thesis presentation.
Joy.
This is really long.
Me oh my.
I hope Mrs. Landry's okay with this.
I don't know why I thought it would be okay to do a stream of consciousness.
AHHHHH.
Give me credit!
It's late already!
Please?
Thanksssssssssssssssssssssss.
Okay.
Over.
And.
Out.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Freedom to Fail
Life is about more than simply getting to the destination. A journey precedes any destination, and is most times the most influential part. The mistakes that are so often made along the way are what make you and I who we are today. The ability to make mistakes and even fail is incredibly key in the process of maturing as individuals. Of course, the key is to learn from one's mistakes. However, without even the simple freedom to fail, it is impossible to have and learn from experience.
When the freedom to fail is taken away from an individual, the opportunity to learn and do better next time is also stolen. When a teacher gives a student a passing grade for something sub-par, that teacher takes away that student's chance to learn from his mistake and study harder next time. Education should not just be about learning from books and professors; it should also be about learning from life and the mistakes made and experiences along the way.
In keeping with what Michael Goodwin said in his video on the loss of the freedom to fail, what is success without failure? Success is attaining a pre-defined goal. In other words, success is reaching the destination. Without the journey to the destination, the destination is nothing. Without mistakes and failures along the way, the journey is nothing but a waste of time, a means to an end. The mistakes and the failures are what make the journey worthwhile. They are what we learn from and strive to improve upon. How can a person ever truly succeed if his ability to fail is taken away?
Along the same lines, if everyone 'succeeds,' how can one truly define success? If everyone is told that they are good enough, that they no longer have to work harder to do better, there is just average. There are no particularly successful people, as well as no one who has failed. When average and even below-average is considered the goal, true success is lost. When SATs are made easier in order to cause fewer students to receive poor scores, the sense of achievement for those who do well is lost. If a student can do just as well not studying as he can by meticulously searching his textbooks for every last answer, there is no reason for that student to try hard to receive good grades. A student that has the ability to seriously rise above and truly succeed no longer has any motivation to do so, as it will not benefit him in any way, as he can do just as well being average.
The freedom to fail is a freedom that most people never even consider. And for this reason, it is most vulnerable to attack.
Michael Goodwin on the loss of the freedom to fail
When the freedom to fail is taken away from an individual, the opportunity to learn and do better next time is also stolen. When a teacher gives a student a passing grade for something sub-par, that teacher takes away that student's chance to learn from his mistake and study harder next time. Education should not just be about learning from books and professors; it should also be about learning from life and the mistakes made and experiences along the way.
In keeping with what Michael Goodwin said in his video on the loss of the freedom to fail, what is success without failure? Success is attaining a pre-defined goal. In other words, success is reaching the destination. Without the journey to the destination, the destination is nothing. Without mistakes and failures along the way, the journey is nothing but a waste of time, a means to an end. The mistakes and the failures are what make the journey worthwhile. They are what we learn from and strive to improve upon. How can a person ever truly succeed if his ability to fail is taken away?
Along the same lines, if everyone 'succeeds,' how can one truly define success? If everyone is told that they are good enough, that they no longer have to work harder to do better, there is just average. There are no particularly successful people, as well as no one who has failed. When average and even below-average is considered the goal, true success is lost. When SATs are made easier in order to cause fewer students to receive poor scores, the sense of achievement for those who do well is lost. If a student can do just as well not studying as he can by meticulously searching his textbooks for every last answer, there is no reason for that student to try hard to receive good grades. A student that has the ability to seriously rise above and truly succeed no longer has any motivation to do so, as it will not benefit him in any way, as he can do just as well being average.
The freedom to fail is a freedom that most people never even consider. And for this reason, it is most vulnerable to attack.
Michael Goodwin on the loss of the freedom to fail
Monday, February 28, 2011
Heroism
"More often than not, a hero's most epic battle is the one you never see; it's the battle that goes on within him or herself." -Kevin Smith
A true hero is not something that is easy for one to become. Like a Jedi, one must master oneself before seeking to fight or defend another. Battle with and eventual mastery of oneself are what keep a hero from becoming a villian. Wrestling one's own selfish desires, pride and arrogance is what gives any ordinary person the ability to be heroic, to think and act beyond him or herself.
In essence, this is what Jesus has called his followers to do. We are commanded to shed our old selves and put on the "new man," no longer giving into our own sinful desires. This is exactly what a hero must do anything heroic. One must master oneself, battle the natural, sinful desires of the flesh, in order to do the heroic.
Many people consider heroism the ability to engage in an outward battle, but the true battle is fought inside oneself. By this definition, Jesus calls every Christian to be a hero.
A true hero is not something that is easy for one to become. Like a Jedi, one must master oneself before seeking to fight or defend another. Battle with and eventual mastery of oneself are what keep a hero from becoming a villian. Wrestling one's own selfish desires, pride and arrogance is what gives any ordinary person the ability to be heroic, to think and act beyond him or herself.
In essence, this is what Jesus has called his followers to do. We are commanded to shed our old selves and put on the "new man," no longer giving into our own sinful desires. This is exactly what a hero must do anything heroic. One must master oneself, battle the natural, sinful desires of the flesh, in order to do the heroic.
Many people consider heroism the ability to engage in an outward battle, but the true battle is fought inside oneself. By this definition, Jesus calls every Christian to be a hero.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Seasons
Have you ever noticed that once you're tired of summer, the leaves start changing? That once you think you can't bear another snowstorm, the flowers start to bloom?
I feel the same way about my life. At this time last year, I would have told you I was terrified of going to college and that I would miss high school way too much. But now that I'm halfway through my senior year, with college just months away, it seems like more of a relief than something to fear. I feel like God knows me so well that He would not make college come too early or too late. He has it come at the perfect time, when I feel like another year of high school would drive me crazy.
This isn't to say that there's nothing about high school that I will miss. There are plenty of things that I will think back on fondly, and certainly miss very much. I will miss seeing friends that I've known forever every day, I will miss having teachers that truly care about me, and plenty of other things about high school. That being said, college is coming at the perfect time. The leaves are changing, and I'm excited to see where this new season will take me.
I feel the same way about my life. At this time last year, I would have told you I was terrified of going to college and that I would miss high school way too much. But now that I'm halfway through my senior year, with college just months away, it seems like more of a relief than something to fear. I feel like God knows me so well that He would not make college come too early or too late. He has it come at the perfect time, when I feel like another year of high school would drive me crazy.
This isn't to say that there's nothing about high school that I will miss. There are plenty of things that I will think back on fondly, and certainly miss very much. I will miss seeing friends that I've known forever every day, I will miss having teachers that truly care about me, and plenty of other things about high school. That being said, college is coming at the perfect time. The leaves are changing, and I'm excited to see where this new season will take me.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Meaningless?
I was told to serve the guests, not to stop and chat. I was told that today is going to be one of their busiest days, and that we must do our best to keep things moving smoothly. I worked as efficiently as I knew how, serving the guests their drinks, and making sure they had any condiments they needed. Others were there to talk with the guests, even pray with them if they felt so led. Totally focused on the task at hand, I was working as hard as I could. That is, until an older, gray-haired woman asked for my help pouring her orange juice. I soon realized that she was blind and obviously needed my help.
As I poured her juice and placed the cup in her hand, she started pouring out her heart. There, in the middle of this busy New York City soup kitchen, she began to tell me all about herself, her life, and the great amount of heartache she had endured throughout it. At first, I could only think about the rest of the volunteers that I had committed to help, and how, by talking with this woman, I was essentially abandoning them.
However, as she continued to talk to me, I realized how much she needed to be heard and to have someone genuinely want to listen to her. She had come there with a hunger for so much more than food; she was craving love. It was at that moment that I realized that even though I had made a commitment to help serve, my presence was needed here, to listen and offer words of love and encouragement. I ended up talking with this woman (who I later came to know as Edith) for about an hour, until the soup kitchen began to close for the day.
Throughout this experience, I learned that when faced with a decision, the answer is not always the easiest choice, or the one that will cause the least amount of disturbance. It is not necessarily what another thinks I should do, or even what the authorities placed over me say I should do. When faced with a decision between two seemingly good paths or actions, I have learned that I have to consider what is truly more valuable. I have to think about the importance of relationships versus getting a job done. For without relationships, life is simply a series of meaningless tasks.
POST 3
As I poured her juice and placed the cup in her hand, she started pouring out her heart. There, in the middle of this busy New York City soup kitchen, she began to tell me all about herself, her life, and the great amount of heartache she had endured throughout it. At first, I could only think about the rest of the volunteers that I had committed to help, and how, by talking with this woman, I was essentially abandoning them.
However, as she continued to talk to me, I realized how much she needed to be heard and to have someone genuinely want to listen to her. She had come there with a hunger for so much more than food; she was craving love. It was at that moment that I realized that even though I had made a commitment to help serve, my presence was needed here, to listen and offer words of love and encouragement. I ended up talking with this woman (who I later came to know as Edith) for about an hour, until the soup kitchen began to close for the day.
Throughout this experience, I learned that when faced with a decision, the answer is not always the easiest choice, or the one that will cause the least amount of disturbance. It is not necessarily what another thinks I should do, or even what the authorities placed over me say I should do. When faced with a decision between two seemingly good paths or actions, I have learned that I have to consider what is truly more valuable. I have to think about the importance of relationships versus getting a job done. For without relationships, life is simply a series of meaningless tasks.
POST 3
Monday, November 22, 2010
The Giver
The Giver, by Lois Lowry, is one of the most thought-provoking books I have read in my short life. It is a short novel, albeit one with a brilliant premise, but the ideas in this book are absolutely incredible. I have read it at least three times, and every time I enjoy it more than the last.
The book is about a sheltered world, a place unconnected to any outside source of knowledge or ideas. This on its own speaks volumes to the importance of human connection and interaction. However, there is much more to the story, as one comes to find out. The story centers around a young boy named Jonas who is chosen for a rather peculiar job, one that is given only to very "special" individuals, hand-picked by a committee of elders. His job is to receive all of the memories passed down from the one who had his job before him, and to hold the memories for all of the citizens of the town.
One soon comes to find out that, many years before, a committee of elders decided that life would be better for the people if they were unable to feel pain, to have any troubles in life, and that a completely controlled life would be better than one filled with choices that could potentially lead to pain. In order to completely control the lives of the people, all of the memories of good things as well as the bad had to be given to one person who held them for the so-called benefit of the people.
I love this book because in the end it shows that the ability to experience pain and to feel sad or even uncomfortable emotions gives us the ability to be happy, to feel comfort, excitement and even love. In order to remove the pain of life, the joy of life must also be removed. For this reason, The Giver is one of my favorite books. I come back to it often when I go through hard times and wonder why life has to be so difficult sometimes, and why it can't all just be good and happy. But then I remember that without the sad, we can't have the happy; without the tumult, we can't have the peace; without the hate, we can't have the love.
POST 2
The book is about a sheltered world, a place unconnected to any outside source of knowledge or ideas. This on its own speaks volumes to the importance of human connection and interaction. However, there is much more to the story, as one comes to find out. The story centers around a young boy named Jonas who is chosen for a rather peculiar job, one that is given only to very "special" individuals, hand-picked by a committee of elders. His job is to receive all of the memories passed down from the one who had his job before him, and to hold the memories for all of the citizens of the town.
One soon comes to find out that, many years before, a committee of elders decided that life would be better for the people if they were unable to feel pain, to have any troubles in life, and that a completely controlled life would be better than one filled with choices that could potentially lead to pain. In order to completely control the lives of the people, all of the memories of good things as well as the bad had to be given to one person who held them for the so-called benefit of the people.
I love this book because in the end it shows that the ability to experience pain and to feel sad or even uncomfortable emotions gives us the ability to be happy, to feel comfort, excitement and even love. In order to remove the pain of life, the joy of life must also be removed. For this reason, The Giver is one of my favorite books. I come back to it often when I go through hard times and wonder why life has to be so difficult sometimes, and why it can't all just be good and happy. But then I remember that without the sad, we can't have the happy; without the tumult, we can't have the peace; without the hate, we can't have the love.
POST 2
Monday, October 25, 2010
Questions
If I think back, I realize this all began when I was a little girl, when my dad would come in my room after I was all ready for bed, and I would just ask him questions. I would lay in bed, asking question after question about topics ranging from metamorphosis to the moon to where maple syrup comes from. My curiosity was endless, as was his ability to answer my probing questions.
My dad, in answering my questions and encouraging me to ask them, showed me the importance of curiosity. He showed me that there truly are no stupid questions, that there is an answer for whatever question I have. Even if he doesn't have the answer, the answer is out there. Someone else might have it, or I might have to find it for myself.
I know today that it's okay for me to ask questions, that God, my Daddy, will answer. He knows even more than my dad, and loves it when I lay in bed before I fall asleep, asking Him questions about His creation. He wants me to question it, to explore it, to find out all I can about what He has made for me to enjoy.
POST 1
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